NAMBLA encourages you to vote for Molester of the Year 2016!
In the spirit of community, we must learn to respect our differences. We agree to disagree about many things, and our hobby is clearly one of them. Our members do SO much more than just molest, including donating to food drives and other charitable events. We encourage you to be active and we want to hear your voice! Please vote for Molester of the Year 2016!
Chester: Chester enjoys fondling little boys in his suburban neighborhood. In 2014 & 2015, he helped his 9-yr-old nephew, a 12-yr-old neighbor boy and 2 pre-teens from his church youth group learn about the pleasures that can be shared using only one’s mouth and he has never invaded orifices below the neck of any child.
Herb: Herb is a particularly enthusiastic practitioner of pleasure. Herb boasts over 500 pleasure partners as of 2015, all between the ages of 3 and 8 years old, and he was able to sodomize all of them!
Please vote today! www.NAMBLA.con/mol2016
FAQ’s about voting-
Question: I think both of the candidates are bad people, and I would rather not vote for either of them.
Answer: We admit that neither man is perfect, but in fact ONE of them is going to be selected, so we encourage you to be active and choose the lesser of the two evils.
Question: I don’t like that the two candidates are both molesters.
Answer: Yes, we get that a lot. We have used our current system for selecting candidates for many years, and we plan to continue using it for a long time. If you would like us to change the system we do have a process for that under Article 321 subsection 3.i.(c)4ii of our bylaws. It is a long read, but if you can get the required 2.3 million signatures within a 21-day period, our board, including secretary Herb and Treasurer Chester will be happy to place it on the agenda as a possible topic for visioning meetings in the future.
Question: It seems like the process is “fixed” and is not reasonable, and I think maybe I would be better off spending my time writing articles and convincing friends that your child molestation organization is just wrong and that just because one molester is not as bad as the other, he is still bad. In fact, molestation and those that support it are sick and wrong.
Answer: At the risk of sounding patronizing, perhaps you need a tin foil hat looking for a utopia? Lol. It seems that you clearly don’t like the way we do things in North America, so perhaps you should move to another part of the world? If you decide that maybe things are not so bad here, and that it wouldn’t kill you to be patriotic, we encourage you to be active in the process. Oh yeah, and your membership fees are due. We need that money to pay Chester and Herb for their tireless work on the board that serves you.
(if you don't get that this is philosophic satire, YOU are a pretty big part of the problem)